John Marston vs Niko Bellic (Remake)
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Other Information

John Marston vs Niko Bellic is the 49th battle of ERBParodies, as well as a remastered version of the original battle of the same name as a battle Royale. It features Ruthless Cowboy from Red Dead Redemption, John Marston, Foreign Criminal from Grand Theft Auto IV, Niko Bellic, Careless student from Bully, Jimmy Hopkins, Vengeful Killer from Manhunt, James Earl Cash, and Badass Cop from Max Payne, Max Payne.


Justin Buckner as John Marston

Nathan Provost as Niko Bellic

Michael Currenti as Jimmy Hopkins (Audio)

SuperThingsOnCups as Jimmy Hopkins (Actor)

Froggy as James Earl Cash

Mat4yo as Max Payne


John Marston:Edit

The name's John Marston, born and raised in Blackwater

Trained to give immigrant a second case of verbal slaughter

If I can take out Van der Line, Williamson and Escuela

All I need to do is point my gun, and you'll flee back to Yugoslavia

This is deal or revenge, yokel, you're literally done

You finally get some friends, but you end up killing one

Tell your overly attached cousin that he'll never get titties

Run away, Nikolai, because I'm taking over Liberty City

Niko Bellic:Edit

Now it's this petty cowboy against me, and I need no introduction,

You're just Lost and Damned in this Ballad of your destruction!

Only a fool would want to battle me, I'll win Grand Theft Automatically

I'm richer than this bitch, and I'll achieve this win so practically

Young and stupid is what you are, and that fact I will enfore,

Why the long face, "pardner"? Is it cause I just ran over your horse?

I cause murder on the mic, I'll rip you into pieces without strife!

I'll bring Havoc on your life, John, and then I'll bang your wife!

Jimmy Hopkins:Edit

Oh, shut up, you guys are boring me more than my classes

Now let me just skip school for a bit so I can kick both of your asses

Now Johnny Boy, you’re just a Clint Eastwood wannabe

Get off your high horse and see the wrath of this Bully

Niko may have guns but I'll potato launch him to the moon

You can't steal a car without it blowing up and it doesn't need to move

It's an Endless Summer of destruction as I beat you down like Gary

When you drunkards came to Rockstar, it upset me!

Before I bike ride out, and since you're never gonna learn

I'll scramble you like my English class and make you my B-Words

James Earl Cash:Edit

This is a ManHunt, without me, it'd just be a WomanHunt

Call me the Director, cause I'm laying down the rules to you cunts

I'll pierce you with this toothpick if you dare to get pissy

This defeat will be more frightening than my encounter with Piggsy

I'll stomp John with MY boots and take down Niko with a punch

I'll chop you into pieces and give the Cerberus their lunch

You'll be patrolled like the Hoods, this beating is not reversible

While you're prancing through mellow, I'll hold the crown for controversial

Max Payne:Edit

Stop talking, Cash, you kill people because your family's gone

Let me make this quick people, and then this battle will be done

My painkillers are at full Max, so you better start running

Because my game is the one that helps the company with funding

I’m a cop, bitches, and I’m putting you all under arrest

I'm an unescapable detective with access to your address

Max Payne is number one boys, i'm a slo-mo mo-fo

After I shoot you down with this one bullet, say hello to my daughter Rose


Who Won ?

The poll was created at 11:12 on July 26, 2014, and so far 12 people voted.

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